I need to feel better about my body. I used to be wayyy more confident than I am today. My self worth is right down the crapper. I mean, I know I'm a good person, but I want to be sexy. To myself. I want to, for lack of a better term, be more turned on when I look in the mirror. I feel so repulsed.
And I don't care what anyone thinks besides the Prof (my hubby), but, I know that we're meant to try for a baby again sometime in the summer/fall. I need to be exercising enough that I can continue to do so into my pregnancy and after.
I want Scarlett to feel good about herself and not have an eating disorder.
I want to get rid of my sleep apnea, and get sick less often.
I feel unclean almost, when I'm this size.
I just can't do this anymore.
TO DO List for Tomorrow: Work out at leas 10 minutes, call the oxygen place for my cpap machine, enjoy LDS General Conference, clean my room, and study for my tests next week.
*edit: Not meant to have a baby and happy with that. hehe. more later.*
I know you can do this. Seriously. If you're ever about to binge, get on IM and tell me to yell at you and I will. :D
ReplyDeletehaha. Good friends yell at you. :-D
ReplyDelete